Wednesday, 16 January 2013


A map of possibly not a real place

Scandal struck The Royal Academy of Cartographers late last night after it emerged one of their members had faked a series of official maps.

The accused, Thierry Gabblewithe (28), holds the position of Deputy Grand Steward of the Ordnance within the academy. He is famed for a series of expeditions to map out previously unexplored regions of the Wilder Hills.

The Wilder Hills are considered one of the most dangerous areas of Abevorn, due to the large numbers of feral bandits and wandering monsters. Reliable maps have been considered vital to promoting safe and profitable trade. This led to The Adventurers' Guild, the Wilder Chamber of Commerce and the Ministry for Rural Affairs agreeing to jointly fund Gabblewithe's expeditions.


However, documents seen by this newspaper suggest Gabblewithe did not in fact undertake any of these expeditions, choosing instead to stay at home and make up the maps instead.

'I have no comment to make at this time,' commented Gabblewithe when challenged outside The Royal Academy's headquarters. He also refused to be drawn on whether he would return his sponsor's money or if he had ever braved a troglodyte den with his theodolite.

'Clearly these are very serious allegations,' said Lady Ramada Stone, Cartographer General. 'I have already announced a full and in-depth investigation, but at this point I would like to emphasise that nothing has yet been proven.'


When asked whether the Academy would be prepared to pay compensation to any adventurers who found themselves attacked by bandits or eaten by a wake of harpies as a result of using an inaccurate map, Lady Stone replied: 'No.'

Questions are now being raised about the accuracy of other official maps and whether these may have contributed to Prince Mikael's recent misadventure in the South. The Adventurers' Guild has already reported a number of epic quests have been postponed or cancelled due to fears that the participants might be venturing out into a fantasy world dreamt up by some loser sitting around in his underpants.

By Casewick Essendine

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